She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
