I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
