my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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