he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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