I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
