ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
