lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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