drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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