you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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