how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
