just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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