i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
