ugly people sure do ruin things
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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