I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
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