I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
