He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I just want nice things and good sex
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
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