strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize