No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
