is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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