margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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