I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Randomize
