so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
