But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
