he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Randomize
