if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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