Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
