You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
