i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
