Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
