At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
