I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
