Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
