he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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