Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
