i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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