need another drink. this is the easiest way
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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