His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
