It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
