good thing vaginas are great cup holders
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize