This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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