singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize