I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
