So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
