are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
wrigley field is MILF paradise
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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