so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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