If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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