i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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