There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
