Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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