Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
